If you notice that this issue is somehow wittier, sharper, and otherwise just all around better, don't worry. There's a simple explanation for it. I was not involved in the production.

Yes, after 112 straight issues, I, Michael Dell, LCS Hockey editor-in-chief and the idol of no one from ages eight to eighty, has temporarily stepped down from my lofty position. In my absence, the other three founding fathers of LCS, Jim Iovino, Zippy the Wonder Chimp, and Matthew Secosky, will each pick up the slack and try to carry the burdensome load. And, hopefully, they'll also pay any outstanding bills and IOUs.

My stepping aside hasn't exactly been the best kept secret in show business. I've heard the rumors. And I'd just like to say that they're all lies. First of all, I'm not even sure if such a surgery exists, but even if it did I doubt it would help.

The truth is that, while I won't be continuing my usual writing and editing chores, I will still be conducting LCS Hockey business. By the time you read this article, I would have already embarked on a nation-wide publicity tour to spread the good word of LCS. It's about time we start to receive the attention we so richly don't deserve.

I will begin my journey on the East Coast, with stops in Philadelphia, New York City, and an unprecedented barnstorming tour of the great state of Delaware. It's long been known that Delaware was one of the three states I always wanted to visit most, with the others, of course, being confusion and drunkenness.

From there it will be on to Chicago, St. Louis, Denver, and Los Angeles. Funds permitting, and if the border patrol is lax, I will then attempt a northern swing through Canada before returning home.

I'll be making public appearances on every stop of the American tour. Be sure to look for me on "Late Night with Conan O'Brien" on Thursday night, February 11. Then I will make by Ed Sullivan Theater debut the next night when I pay a visit to my personal hero David Letterman. If there's time I'm also supposed to have lunch with Regis Philbin, but that may or may not be televised.

Just how long I'll be away is still uncertain. With any luck, I'll be back in time for the next issue in two weeks. Then again, with any luck, maybe I won't. We'll just have to wait and see.

Good luck in the future.

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